Depersonalization

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 My experience with depersonalization and some information about it

 The first time I had symptoms of disorders was psychosis accompanied by schizophrenia (episodic), and there I already felt like I was out of my body.  It didn't last long but it was a bizarre feeling!  And it happened 3 or 4 times, in almost 8 years of discovering various mental disorders.

 When I was a child, even a teenager, I had the experience of exiting the body in dreams.  And I remember liking the feeling in those cases.  There was even a very well-known episode, which I have seen several people also report: seeing their own bodies from above.  From the top of the bed, like floating, see the body down there sleeping.  But the real depersonalization I think is a little bit different!

 When you are experiencing neurological failure, or whatever, neurotransmitters are no longer functioning properly, your head travels through everything you have ever learned in life.  Everything is confusing and disconnected, but everything is based on what you have already experienced or know.  There can be so much mental confusion that you may not be able to distinguish reality any further.  The world, in your perception, changes!

 I think it can happen that the person has experiences with psychosis and schizophrenia but does not necessarily have depersonalization.  Many people will experience depersonalization during their lifetime, but they won't even know it was that.  There are many cases of losing reality, seeing and / or hearing something (both outside and inside the head), but there may not be a break with the personality.

 Depersonalization happens when you lose connection with your own body, which is why you can also lose reality.  For in everything it seems that you are no longer within yourself.  And it can happen that you really feel out of control, or that external things don't belong to you.  As if you weren't part of everything that happens around you.

 As well as derealization, which I have also experienced.  To feel the foreign body and think I was in a movie, with everything in mist around me.  It was difficult to see normal.

 But a very fast episode happened, and the sensation was somewhat similar to depersonalization.  And this one I had more experience to explain better.

 I'll tell you a little about my experience:

 Every time I suffered from the crises of the disorders that affected me, I lost the reality but I was able to see the world differently in everything.  Of course, the body is foreign, but it is possible to feel the difference in the types of loss of reality.

 Real depersonalization makes you look like everything you do doesn't come from you.

 In my case, I was already upset, my head was not normal, and I had a specific pain: different pressure on one side of the head.  My body was responding to crises with fears, different eyesight, modified hearing and everything ... Then when I think it couldn't get worse, depersonalization came.

 At first I started to think it was too weird, not that I wasn't already, but I found it weirder the fact that I said something and my head kept repeating everything.  I was moving something and it seemed to be someone else's arms.  And that feeling of 'dejavu' all the time.

 The hours passed and I felt more and more my body floating, as if I no longer lived in my body.

 It seems that it has to do with the excess of crisis that I was facing, I was stunned.

 And with me the feeling was confused, because with so many symptoms at the same time, you can no longer understand anything.

 You have to work your mind!

 What I remember is looking at me from the outside as if I knew everything I was going to do.  I saw myself but I couldn't really see myself.  What I saw was a body outside of mine, but I knew it was my own body.  Like two of me!

 But I could see myself because I know what I look like, looking in the mirror.  Only they are hallucinations of the head.  And you are there but you are not.

 My concern was not to return, to stay that way forever.  That's when I started to work my mind with everything I learned about it.  But I didn't return to normal, I was being hit by several symptoms at the same time.  And then when one thing passed, another came.

 My experience with depersonalization did not last long, but I still felt it sometimes when in crisis.

 My improvement came with medications and therapy.  The medications balance what you need and the therapies (to help you know how to control the mind) help you not to disconnect like that with crises.  It is learning to connect with yourself and trying to always be well no matter what type of crisis.  But I'm talking about a great professional, of course!

 And it should also be noted that it is all a malfunction in the brain.

 It won't last a lifetime, you won't die!

 You have to treat yourself, you have to seek help!

 Every crisis is bad for everything (body, mind, emotional, psychological), you must not let it go what you feel!

 If you have any questions or want to know more, I am available!

 Franciely Montenegro

 🙌😘